Riding Into The Storm

From this spot the mountains can be seen just over the tree tops but
because of the approaching storm, the mountains are not visible at all.

Sunday morning Isaac asked me to take him on a bike ride. He had been wanting to get out on his bike for some time now so I took him on a quick ride through the neighborhood. Although we only rode for a little more than half an hour, we covered a good amount of distance; I was impressed anyway. Since the beginning of July I have been telling Margaret that I was going to start biking to work; but for one reason or another I couldn't ride the bike because I needed to use my service van. That morning after my ride with Isaac, I was so pumped that I decided to drive the van to the office, leave it there and then bike home. I figured I would leave the van at the office from now on so when I need it, it's there. So, that night I did it; I loaded up my laptop and bike, dropped off the van and laptop at the office and then road the bike home. Going at a pretty good pace, it took me thirty minutes to get home. I noticed that, for the most part, the trip was up hill.

On Monday morning, my first day to ride to work, I left with about forty five minutes to get there. I arrived with plenty of time to spare. It felt good to ride to work. Coasting down the hills breathing in the cool, refreshing morning air. It was a great way to start the day.

At lunch I ran to the store and picked up a backpack for my laptop and all of the other stuff that I normally carry with me. As I transferred the stuff from the old bag to the new backpack I realized that I carry a lot of stuff around. As a bi-vocational pastor I find it a necessity to have some of my study material with me at all times, just in case I have an opportunity to study wherever I'm at.

Around three o'clock in the afternoon I heard some comments from down the hall about the weather and how dark it looked over the mountains. "Storm's moving in from the mountains! We're going to get dumped on!" shouted one of my coworkers. In all of my zeal and excitement to bike to work, I did not consider the weather. I went outside to look at the sky; it was dark. I began to get nervous.

Being the analytical person that I am, I typically don't jump into things without first thoroughly thinking them through; at least that's how I see myself. Looking back on my life, however, I find it interesting that some of the biggest life decisions that I've made, were made on a whim; without thinking too much about them. Most of these decisions I don't regret, and in fact, if I had stopped to analyze them at the time (or listened to the advice of others), I probably would have made different choices that would have taken my life in a whole other direction. So I embraced my not-so-thought-out decision to ride my bike to work, I put my goal before me and I determined to ride home--rain or shine.

As the workday was quickly coming to a close several folks offered me a ride. I declined. I also kept my mind from the thought of leaving my bike at the office and driving the van home or calling Margaret to pick me up. At this point, nothing was going to keep me from my goal. I strapped on the twenty pound backpack, climbed on the bike and began to make my way home.

Having made this trip twice within the past twenty four hours, from the office to the house the night before and from the house to the office that morning, my legs were already fatigued. I had only gone a couple of blocks from the office when my thighs began to burn. This is when I discovered that my gears are in need of a major adjustment; my shifting was limited for the entire ride home. As I pushed ahead, up hill and against the wind, the extra weight from the backpack became an ever-present reality. If this wasn't enough, I could see the dark gray clouds begin to cover the foothills as they quickly advanced in my direction. I was becoming discouraged.

In my mind it became a race; I had to beat the storm to the house but I had to keep a much slower pace than I did the night before. I prayed as I peddled; asking for endurance and the strength to make it. Once I started to feel a slight drizzle on my forearms and my face, I began to look around for places of refuge in the event that it started to "dump" on me. As I made my way through the bike trail I saw several people huddled under trees or standing beneath underpasses with their dogs. I was sure at any moment the rain would begin to fall on me and I would soon be drenched; my computer, Bible, books and everything else in my backpack. Every now and then a big raindrop would hit my face or my arms and I'd think, "This is it! It's going to pour!" but it never did.

Once I past the halfway mark I looked up to see that the mountains were becoming visible again. The dark clouds cleared up and I never felt the full impact of the storm. I finished my ride home in a cool, misty breeze. When I arrived at the house everyone was surprised that I wasn't drenched because the neighborhood had been "dumped on." I gave thanks to God and I was glad that I didn't give up but rather pushed myself as I was riding into the storm not knowing what to expect.

I feel like I am riding into a storm right now. I can see the dark clouds ahead and it's approaching fast but I have to remain resilient and stand my ground. It's tempting to look around for places of refuge to run and hide but I need to be looking to God for my refuge and my strength. I'm not sure what the outcome is going to be; I don't know what's going to happen when this storm passes or if I will even make it through the storm, but whatever happens, I know God is in it. I just hope I am faithful in this test in order to glorify His Name.



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Getting Back In The Swing

As a bi-vocational pastor (i.e., having a fulltime job in addition to overseeing a congregation) I've seen a pattern in the ebbs and flows of 'busy seasons' especially around the Moedim. This year, however, after Shavuot the busyness seemed to increase and hold at a steady, accelerated pace. I take this as an indication of a number of things: 1) my children are getting older, 2) our community is growing, 3) business is picking up.

As my children get older I have noticed that each of them are requiring more and more one-on-one interaction. This takes time and effort, which I will gladly give. The conversations are getting deeper, the questions are more thoughtful, and the bike rides are getting longer! There's nothing that can compare to spending time with my family.

As our community grows it requires more attention too. Delegating tasks is now a necessity if I'm going to get anything done, namely prepare a message for Shabbat. God continues to send folks our way and folks continue to step up to serve. We will be appointing deacons in the next month or so. This is an exciting step in the development of our community and an indication of the blessings of God on this local body.

Being in the HVAC business for the past few years I've come to understand the 'busy seasons' in this industry as well. When the weather gets warmer, the phone begins to ring off the hook. Thankfully we are gainfully employed with service and maintenance calls to businesses all over the Metro Denver area. Although I'm not a service technician and sit at a desk, I still feel the increase of work in our shop. Thank God for the heat!

Although I haven't made a blog entry over the past month and a half, I haven't been short of topics to write about, just the time to do it. There have been many things that I've wanted to address or comment on, but because more and more topics keep popping up every week, I may never get back to those thoughts. Oh well, I'll just keep moving forward and try to get back in the swing of things.



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Matthew 5:11

From time to time I will receive emails with words of encouragement or heartfelt exhortations. As they pray for me, believing friends and family will send Scripture passages that they feel led to share.

A second ago, someone sent this passage to me...

"Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, 

and persecute you, 

and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, 

for my sake." 

KJV

That was the whole email, Matthew 5:11.

I wonder what they heard now. On second thought, I don't care. Just keep praying for me folks. I need it and I greatly appreciate it.

Hands to the plow...



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Top Seven Blog Posts of 2011

Ha ha, looks like I'm at a New Year's Eve Party - but I'm not... 

Aside from buying a new planning calendar, I typically don't pay too much attention to the change of the year on the 'Gregorian' calendar because, well, it's pagan (LOL! - no, really). But earlier this week I was reviewing my blog stats for the past year—you see my blog software categorizes and tracks the posts by month and year—anyway, some blog posts really stood out because of their substantially high number of visits. So, I thought I'd share with you my Top Seven Most Visited Blog Posts of 2011. These are not necessarily my favorites, but the most visited by you, the reader. Today's entry will be #87. Compare that to the measly nine blog entries I posted between July-December of 2010 (Man, that was lame!).

Okay, the Most Visited Blog Post of 2010 and the former All-Time Most Visited Blog Post is:

The "Donkey in a Ditch" Principle: A Quick Look (Jul 22, 2010)

Having been in a leadership position for many years now, I've heard a multitude of reasons and excuses for missing Shabbat Service that were deemed a "Donkey in a Ditch." So, in this blog entry I briefly examine this ambiguous principle in an attempt to put it to rest. It didn't work. This was my fourth entry ever on SetYourHeart.org and it has dominated as the top ranking post for the past year and a half! But in November 2011, a new post emerged as the most visited of the year and all-time. Before we go there, I'll run through the other six. Let's start with number seven of Top Seven Most Visited Blog Posts of 2011:

7. The Pagan Origins of Thanksgiving? (Nov 1, 2011)
This was a response to the feedback I received on the post previous to it call Easter, Halloween - Same Thing (Oct 31, 2011). Can you believe that some folks actually think that Thanksgiving and the 4th of July have pagan origins? Based on the amount views, this must be a popular topic!

6. The Date of Yom HaBikkurim (Apr 21, 2011)
Every year as we approach Pesach (Passover) many questions arise. The date of Yom Habikkurim (First Fruits) is one of those questions. This is the only area where we, at FRMC, deviate from the Rabbinic calendar in regard to the Moedim. So, I figured I needed to clearly explain our reasoning and our stance. This is a popular topic in the Messianic community. I'm not surprised that it got a lot of views. It also got a few lengthy comments.

5. Self-Excommunication and Matthew 18 (Oct 27, 2011)
In this post I took issue with some comments made on the website of a congregation where I once served as a pastor. I do not intend on attacking a brother on this blog, but I will defend myself, my family and my community. Also, I am finding it necessary to challenge faulty teachings that are made in public and have the potential of negatively affecting the body, especially our local Ekklesia. So, in 2012 you might see more posts like this. "Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another." (Proverbs 27:17)

4. Classrooms Are For Girls (May 27, 2011)
I have to admit, this post gained popularity as the new public school year drew near. As teachers desperately searched the Internet for new classroom ideas, they unwittingly stumbled upon this blog entry. Ha! I hope they actually read it and took the topic to heart or did research for themselves; why not? They are teachers!

3. The "Matthew 18" Principle: A Quick Look (Jan 4, 2011)
This post was a train-of-thought response to a number of injustices that took place at a local church. This church twisted Scripture and violated Biblical Principles in disfellowshipping some members who were long-time, faithful servants. It was a classic example of an abuse of authority. As I read the Scriptures, I wrote my thoughts about the passage with these injustices in mind. I followed it up with comments as more thoughts came to mind. Be sure to read my final comment on August 29, 2011. This post got such a high ranking because it was shared extensively through email.

2. FAQ: Are You Sephardic? (Apr 29, 2011)
If you are Latino (aka Hispanic) and you are walking in Torah, at some point you will be asked if you have Sephardic Roots, if you are a Crypto-Jew or if you are a Marrano. Sometimes I am told that I am Sephardic because of my last name. This post explains my experience with the Sephardic question and I give my answer. This post was widely shared throughout Sephardic forums and websites.

Finally, the moment you've been waiting for...

The Most Visited Blog Post of 2011 
and the NEW All-Time Most Visited Blog Post is:

1. Culture of Death In Children's Clothes (Nov 16, 2011)
I guess this post was, and is still, so popular because it was something that most folks can relate to. Why on earth is the Gap printing skulls all over children's clothing and selling it as if it's okay? As if it is the normal thing to do? As soon as I posted this blog entry, it spread like wildfire. I felt like I was delivering some breaking news! Maybe I was. I felt like a journalist! Maybe I am. The reason it got so many visits is because it was posted on the homepage of a couple of online news outlets and it was widely shared on facebook and through email.

There you have it, the Top Seven Most Visited Blog Posts of 2011. Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. I hope you have enjoyed it. Next year, don't be afraid to comment on my entries and please, continue to share them with your friends through email, on facebook, on Google+, on Twitter, etc...

In case you are wondering, this is my personal favorite post of 2011:

The Pink Toothbrush (Jul 7, 2011)

I laughed as I wrote it, and I still laugh when I read it today.



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I'm Upgrading, Again

Oodles of old, stretched wrapped CRT Monitors
sit on pallets in the Goodwill warehouse.

It's been about two and a half weeks since my last post (which, by the way, generated close to 1,000 unique visits in just 2 days! A new record for www.SetYourHeart.org!). It's hard to follow a post like that. Besides, I've got a lot of 'stuff' in the hopper these days; plus, I've been feeling like old, sluggish hardware. You know, when you get a new computer it's fast, fun and exciting. There are new gadgets, software and options to explore. It's inspiring. When you get a new, larger monitor the picture is clearer. You can see more of the desktop. You can open windows larger. You can get more done, or so it seems. I'm needing to make some changes in my life in order to ignite that fire of creativity and inspiration. I'm needing an upgrade, or should I say—I am in the process of upgrading.

Lately, it's been a very busy, but a very creative time for me, my family and our community. More ideas and more projects are popping up and some are just over the horizon. It's time for a change—I am changing.

Suggested Reading:
How To Change Your Church



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In the Springs at the Garden

Taking a hike in Colorado Springs at Garden of the Gods
Aaron (5), Miryam (7), Isaac (8), Maya (11), Michaela (13)

Although I have a lot of Hebrew homework to do, yesterday morning we decided to drop everything and drive down to Colorado Springs and spend the day at the Garden of the Gods. Because the forecast says 'snow' for Wednesday and because the past few weeks have been a very busy time, Margaret felt like we needed to spend some time together as a family. It was a great idea.

The Garden of the Gods is one of the more popular tourist attractions in Colorado. The natural red rock formations are amazing to look at and marvel at Hashem's creation. Because we had Little Mo with us, our ability to do some 'real' hiking was limited. We stayed on the paved trail but we were still able to see some awesome sites. Click on the photos below to get a closer look at some of the sites we saw...

North Gateway Rock

Three Graces

Gray Rock

View from the Sleeping Giant

Related Link:
Garden of the Gods Visitor and Nature Center
Central Garden Area Map



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Don't Learn Hebrew By Yourself

My Hebrew Classmate, Mike Formby, and me.

When doing something as crazy as learning Hebrew, it's best not to do it alone. When he found out that I had signed up for the TRI Beginning Hebrew Grammar Course, my buddy Mike signed up too. It's good to know that someone is there to encourage you when taking on something as difficult as this. It's also good to know that I am not the only one attempting this with a full-time job and a family! It takes a lot of discipline and it's a huge sacrifice, but I know it will be worth it in the end. Thanks Mike, for the encouragement!



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Holy Smokes I'm Reading Hebrew!

Here I am, up late at night learning me some Hebrew from Tim Hegg.

I can't believe it! I'm reading and translating Hebrew! It's coming along slowly but I'm doing it and I am amazing myself. The key is to stay on top of it; practice, read, study, memorize. It's hard man, it's hard. The class is really accelerated. It's only week five and we're already into gender, person, and number (singular/plural); and vocabulary words!

I sure hope we get a break for Sukkot.



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Driving 800 Miles To Encourage Mom

Mom and me, October 2, 2011

FYI -- This post was typed on my Android with my right thumb...

My mother hasn't met the latest addition to our family, little Moses, who was born on June 11, 2011; almost 4 months ago. She has also recently had back surgery and has not enjoyed the recovery process. All the medication and discomfort has worn her out and as I talked to her over the phone this past Friday, she sounded very discouraged.

Margaret and I thought it would be a good idea to cheer her up by surprising her with a visit from her newest grandchild. So we loaded the Suburban and drove out, after the close of Shabbat, to Fort Worth, Texas--my hometown. I recruited the support of my only sister, Sonnya, and upon arrival, we blessed the socks off Mom.

After our 14-hour drive to my parent's house we carefully placed Mo, still in his car sear, in front of their front door. We rang the bell and hid. Sonnya did a great job at getting Mom and Dad to the door to see who it was. They didn't recognize him, of course, but quickly realized who he was. They were pleasantly surprised to see us all.

It's good to be home for the week.



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Yom Teruah was a Teruah!

A Blast! Get it? Anyway...

That's me blasting the shofar!

Every year our Moed celebrations get better and better. This year was no exception. We had a great time going through the shofar service and the tashlich ceremony. We also enjoyed the food and the fellowship. This year there were folks from 8 different Messianic communities celebrating with us! I think this might be a record. Click on the link below to view photos of our time at Faversham Park in Westminster:

Yom Teruah - 1 Tishrei 5772 | 28, 29 September 2011

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Lakeside Season Comes To A Close

Shutting down Lakeside on 9/11
In this photo: Rachel, Isaac, Maya, Sarah, Michaela

In celebration of Miryam's birthday, the kids had one last 'hooray' at Lakeside before the season ended. We got there when it opened and stayed until it closed. Here are some photos of the day...

Aaron had a great time riding by himself,
however he did make at least 3 friends that day.

Rebekah and Miryam spent the day together. 

I can't believe I got on the Zoom the last time
we came to Lakeside. Free-falling is not fun.

Michaela, Rachel and Isaac survived the Zoom.

"Yeeeehaaaaw!"

Watching the Zoom ascend from the Ferris Wheel. 

Aaron joins the girls in their airplane.

Bumping around on the Auto Skooters.

Aaron had one round on the Auto Skooters. When he went
through the line again they re-measured him; he was slightly
too short and was not allowed to ride again. 

Having an ice cream cone break before going back for more.

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Restoration The Right Way

“If your brother sins against you, 

go and tell him his fault, 

between you and him alone.”

- Matthew 18:15a (ESV)

“So if you are offering your gift at the altar 

and there remember that your brother has something against you, 

leave your gift there before the altar and go. 

First be reconciled to your brother, 

and then come and offer your gift.” 

- Matthew 5:23-24 (ESV)

Tonight at sundown we will officially begin the 2nd week of the month of Elul, The Month of Repentance. During this time as we all seek to restore relationships with our brothers and sisters in Messiah, please seek to do this in a Biblical manner. There are really only two scenarios for restoration: 1) when we have been offended, 2) when we have offended someone.

1. If you have been offended, if your brother or sister has sinned against you—first go to them alone and try to work it out with them. Begin with prayer and explain to them how you feel. It would be inappropriate to announce to everyone that you know what they've done to you and how it has made you feel.
2. If you have offended somebody and they come to tell you how they have been hurt by you—listen to them and own up to your fault. Begin with prayer and listen with an open mind and a heart ready for restoration. It would be inappropriate to deny someone the opportunity to clear the air about an offense. 

Within these two scenarios there are many variations of how the meeting will be played out. When confronted, some people will deny the actions that they are accused of and some will brush them off as a misunderstanding or a joke that was not meant to be taken seriously; but sometimes it really may have been a misunderstanding or a joke. Sometimes the offense may have taken place years ago and the person confronted does not remember. Whatever the situation, try to make restoration the right way. What if, when you confront someone, they do not take responsibility for their actions? What if, when you are confronted, you are accused of doing something that you don't think you should apologize for? The Apostle Paul says, “Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be defrauded?” (1 Corinthians 6:7b, NAS) In other words, the goal is to be restored, not to be right.



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TRI Classes Start Today

The First Hebrew Primer:
The Adult Beginner's Path to Biblical Hebrew, Third Edition

It's hard to believe that 18 years ago on this very day I was honorably discharged from the Army. I will never forget this date because finishing my tour with the Army was a huge, huge milestone in my life. I had proven to myself that I had staying power and that I could actually accomplish what I had set my mind to do. One month after I was out, I started working towards a degree in graphic design at the Art Institute of Dallas. After college I had a fulfilling 11-year stint in the design industry. Now, close to two decades after leaving the Armed Forces, I have enrolled in a 3-year, online, Messianic, Torah school. My ultimate goal in taking this course is to learn how to handle the Text correctly, so I can study It properly and teach It more accurately. One of the values of our fledgeling community is the proper handling of the Scriptures and going through this TRI program is my contribution. Because I am married at 40 years old with six children and a full-time job, it will be a challenge to find the time to study. But, this will only be one more test of my resolve and this time, I've got Adonai pulling for me and I've got the help of His Ruach.



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The Pink Toothbrush

My toothbrush was too gnarly to display here, so I posted this stock photo.

When we first got married, toothbrushes were not something that Margaret and I ever put too much thought into. We would buy the Oral-B 2-pack or whatever was on sale. I would get, what we considered, the more masculine of the two colors. We never formally discussed our method of selecting toothbrush colors, it just happened. If there was a blue and a green, I'd get the blue. If there was a green and a red, I'd get the green. If there was a red and a purple, I'd get the red. You get the idea. Now that we have children, it's interesting that this same method continues without us saying anything about it. The boys select the masculine colors and the girls select the feminine colors. It just happens.

Now with seven of us in the house brushing our teeth up to three times a day, we go through a lot of toothbrushes. We usually keep a few extra packs of 'back-up' toothbrushes in the cabinet, just in case. Recently, our supply ran low and I was in need of a new toothbrush but the only color available was pink. Since I had already thrown my old toothbrush in the trash can, I had no choice but to use this one. That evening, while I was alone in the bathroom brushing my teeth, I considered my feelings toward my new pink toothbrush. Why did it bother me? I guess because it is such a personal item that is never used by anyone else, a toothbrush is like an extension of yourself. When we find a blue toothbrush left out on the sink we know that it belongs to one of the boys; and when we find a purple one on the sink, we know it belongs to one of the girls. But associating a pink toothbrush with me, the Dad—unthinkable!

On occasion, you can find a few of us brushing our teeth together huddled around the sink in one of the bathrooms. Everyone at work, gazing at each other through the reflection in the mirror as we brushed away the grime of the day. But since I've had this pink toothbrush, I've avoided these family gatherings. I felt a little uneasy about using the pink toothbrush, especially in front of my boys.

A few days later, as I was rounding up the kids for bed, I forgot about my toothbrush dilema. I loaded my pink bristles with Tom's of Maine, walked into the upstairs bathroom and joined two of my youngest at the sink. My youngest daughter, Miryam (6), just stared at the toothbrush in my hand; it was the same color as hers. My middle son, Aaron (4), who was standing on the toilet seat, laughed out loud. He could not hold back his big smile and chuckle as he pointed at my toothbrush and asked, "Are you going to brush your teeth with that one? Is that your toothbrush? It's a pink one!" I set it down on the sink and began to help him brush his teeth. I explained to him, in a matter-of-fact adult-in-charge kind of tone, the reason why I was the owner of a pink toothbrush and how it could happen to anyone; even him. He continued to chuckle as I finished him up. Miryam just watched and listened, very respectfully not saying a word. Once they were both finished, I shooed them off to bed and then brushed my own teeth. That night I could not stop thinking about how tickled Aaron was because of my pink toothbrush. Actually, I was pleased with his response.

It is a concern, I assume, with father's of older girls and younger boys, that their boys would look up to their sisters so much that they would begin to 'act' like them. On one occasion my two oldest daughters brought me their baby dolls and a baby blanket so I could wrap them up the same way that we would wrap up their new little sister, Miryam. I wrapped up Michaela's doll and then I wrapped up Maya's doll. As they cuddled their babies and walked upstairs to their bedroom, around the corner came 2-year-old Isaac. He handed me a baby doll and a blanket so I could wrap up this doll too. I remember trying to redirect his attention to his trucks or blocks but he was determined to get his baby wrapped up so he could join his sisters. So I did it for him. As I watched him climb the stairs, doing his best to hold the baby without dropping it, many thoughts came to mind. I must be working to much and not spending enough time with him. He is spending too much time with girls. He needs a brother or a male friend. Before I went into panic mode, I noticed him standing in the hallway at the top of the stairs holding his baby out in front of him, examining it. With both hands, he grabbed the baby by the ankles and began to repeatedly slam it's head against the wall. He then threw the baby and the blanket to the floor and ran into the room with the girls. At that moment I realized that spending time with his sisters was not going to change the fact that he was a boy, through and through.

I'm getting a new toothbrush, maybe a black one...



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TRI Mini Course

TRI Moodle Interface

Just finished the TRI Mini Course. I would love to sign up this September but, like I tell my children all the time, "We'll see."

The Moodle interface was useable and intuitive, but the screen was a bit busy. If this course was only three short lessons, I can imagine with three or more complete lessons, the screen could become a bit overwhelming. Maybe a page for each class would be less cluttered? Just a suggestion.

The course was what I expected and hoped for. Lessons that I can listen to on my own time. It gave me the flexibility to do all the things I need to as a husband, father of six, full-time employee and community leader and still make time to listen to the lessons and do the assignments. However, this was a mini course and for the most part, only a peek into how TRI will hold their online classes and how to use Moodle. It was not an indication of how much time will be required every week. My only hope now (aside from money falling into my lap) is that students will be allowed to take one or two classes at a time. It would take me much longer to finish, but hey, I'm patient.

You can find out more about TRI here: torahresourceinstitute.com



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And Sought To Put Him To Death

The Brit Milah of Moses Michael Gonzales took place on the eighth-day,
16th of Sivan, 5771 which corresponds to Saturday, June 18, 2011

A week before my son was born I had a dream about his circumcision. In the dream we were at our church building celebrating with our entire community before the ceremony when I realized I had not yet told the mohel about my son's birth. It was only a couple of minutes before we were to begin the Brit Milah (Covenant of Circumcision) liturgy and the mohel was not there. He lives in Fort Collins, which is at least an hour away, and at this point I wasn't even sure if he was available to make it. My gut was filled with anxiety as I looked out my bedroom window, beating my fist on the window seal wondering what to do (don't ask me how I got to my bedroom—it's a dream!). I thought, "How could I, a leader in our community, be so negligent and miss this important detail?" I woke up convinced that this dream was true. I was still beating myself up and my gut was filled with nervousness. It all seemed so real. I turned to my wife, put my hand under the covers, reached out and felt her belly. Ah, relief. She was still pregnant. It was only a dream. The anxiety left but the thoughts remained.

The Covenant of Circumcision is one of those appointed times that doesn't give you a lot of time to plan—only eight days. We knew we were having a boy so we knew we would be needing the services of a mohel. We contacted a mohel one month prior and made him aware of our son's expected due date and the fact that Margaret usually gives birth two-weeks early. Our son was actually born four days after the due date which really through us all for a loop (see: In Uncharted Territory). A few hours after the birth I contacted the mohel to tell him the news and found out that he was going to be out of town on the eighth-day. I felt anxiety starting to develop deep in my gut. 

On top of the short notice after the birth of a son, what makes it even trickier when planning for a circumcision is when the eighth-day falls on Shabbat (Sabbath) or a Moed (Feast Day). In our case it fell on Shabbat. That's why you should always have a 'Plan B' in case the mohel is not available or something goes wrong with the logistics. My fallback plan was to have a local pediatrician perform the circumcision; however, this plan only works Monday thru Friday during normal business hours. The anxiety began to intensify.

It is the responsibility of the father to make sure that his infant son is circumcised—that would be me. Also, the elders are to live exemplary lives for their community to follow—that would also be me. You could say that I had a lot riding on my shoulders at this point and it was feeling like a ton of bricks. I had recently announced to the community that everyone would be invited to the ceremony and once I found out that the ceremony fell on Shabbat, I knew that there would be a good turnout of members. My concern was that my dream was coming true. I did not have a mohel lined up yet and everyone was going to show up and see that I was not prepared. Huh-boy. I was now feeling the same anxiety that I did after the dream.

I don't want to come across legalistic about the situation, but I believe that circumcision is important—important to Adonai. If we desire to follow the Torah, then we should do whatever we can to perform the circumcision of our infant boys at the appointed time. The ordeal I was in brought to mind the incident in Exodus 4:24-26 concerning Moses and his wife Zipporah. This is an odd passage about the circumcision of Moses's son that has drawn much attention and debate. The popular explanation of this passage is that Moses—the appointed leader of his people, the representative of Adonai, and the person chosen to deliver the Torah to Israel—had procrastinated and neglected to circumcise his own son. Because of this, Adonai came down and "sought to put him to death." Now, I don't think that my life, or anyone's life for that matter, would be in danger if the circumcision of an infant son is neglected. But the fact that I am the leader of my home, a leader in a Torah-Community and I am a teacher of the Torah means that I will someday have to answer for my negligence and my bad example. I would never make anyone feel guilty about not circumcising their sons or doing it on the 'wrong' day, but I will strongly recommend to the families in our community to try as hard as they can to do it and do it on the eighth-day.

Through the providence of Adonai, after a couple of days of butterflies in my stomach, I was reconnected with the mohel who circumcised my second son, Aaron, on Yom Kippur 5767 (2006). I confirmed the date and scheduled the ceremony. The community was there and everything went off without a hitch. My third son, Moses, was circumcised on the eighth-day as commanded. Baruch HaShem! After all of that I have now come to realize that the circumcision was the easy part; now comes the commitment and diligence in bringing him up in the discipline and instruction of Adonai (Ephesians 6:4).

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Appreciating the Foul Poles in my life

Foul Pole, a photo by Michael David Gonzales on Flickr.

I had coffee with a good friend of mine this morning and it really made my day and my week. I haven't met with him in a long time so it was good to catch up. When we first started Front Range, back in 2009, I would meet with Jarrod on a weekly basis for coffee and a bagel at Einstein's. How we met was a God directed appointment and we continued to meet because of a common interest. We were both in the process of planting a 'Family Integrated' church. Ours–Messianic, and theirs–Christian. He shared with me his wealth of knowledge about Biblical and historical family integration in the church and ancient Israel. He had recently graduated from Denver Seminary where he wrote his master's thesis on this topic. In addition to all the information he shared, Jarrod was also very encouraging which was what I really needed at the time. Starting a church is not easy and it can get intimidating and overwhelming at times; a lot of the time.

What I noticed about our meeting today was that Jarrod holds me accountable in my thoughts and actions. I don't think I've noticed this in the past like I did today. I don't remember asking him to hold me accountable, he just does it. Why? Well, this is what a godly friend is supposed to do. As believers, we should be challenging each other spiritually because Adonai is part of our friendship. Proverbs 27:17 says Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another. This means that when we come together as friends and as we share our ideas and our thoughts, we should be encouraging and admonishing each other in the process. This back and forth challenging each other in areas of weakness, encouraging each other in new pursuits will continually push us toward Adonai and strengthen our relationship with each other.

A godly friend is like a foul pole at a baseball park. When a ball is hit over the centerfield fence it's obviously a homerun. But when the ball is hit over the fence straight up the foul line, depending on where you are standing, it is hard to determine if it is a good ball or a foul ball. The foul pole is there to make it clear, no matter where you are, if the ball went foul or not. Sometimes when we pass our ideas and thoughts by our friends, we may think they are homeruns; But after meeting and talking it over with them, we discover that our thoughts or past actions were actually foul balls.

Thank you, Adonai, for putting foul poles in my life; friends who push me back to You and Your Word.

Blessed is the man
who walks not in the counsel of the wicked,
nor stands in the way of sinners,
nor sits in the seat of scoffers;
Psalm 1:1

Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise,
but the companion of fools will suffer harm.
Proverbs 13:20

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Making Memories With My Son

This was a memorable weekend for my oldest son, Isaac. I didn't plan on it really. It just happened that way.

Last Wednesday Margaret called me up at work to tell me that Isaac was very discouraged. Not only was he emotionally hurt, he was also physically injured. He had smashed his finger pretty good trying to build himself a fort and he had given up. You know what I mean by fort, right? A hideout, a clubhouse, a secret laboratory. Every boy needs one. Anyway...

Over the past couple of years Isaac has attempted to build many forts. I have been concerned with his desire to build because he lacks some basic concepts in construction; he is still very young. He doesn't understand that heavy, unsecured boards overhead will only lead to disaster and now, he is trying to use tools which require supervision. Margaret suggested that I set aside some time on Sunday (Mother's Day) and build a fort with him. I thought it was a good idea so she handed the phone to Isaac and we made our plans. When I got home that evening I looked on the family calendar that we keep on the refrigerator and he had penciled-in our time on Sunday. Even after I saw this on the calendar, I still did not realize how much this time meant to him.

I remember when I was a kid growing up in Texas, the summers were so hot that we had to find ways to entertain ourselves indoors. My brother and I would build forts inside our room which would keep us busy for hours. We'd have blankets stretched out across the room secured to the dresser under a stack of encyclopedias (And Mom said we never used the encyclopedias—Ha!). In our fort our imaginations ran wild. We had our own little world in there. We were soldiers keeping the enemy out of our camp or we were castaways on a strange island keeping the hungry dinosaurs at bay. Whatever the situation was, we had a blast.

But I don't remember building these forts as much as I remember building the patio with my Dad or working on the car with him. The forts were fun, don't get me wrong, but spending time with Dad working in the yard or on the car or even fixing the sink were the times that made a lasting impression on me. Just hanging out with Dad at the hardware store or the auto parts shop always made my day. If I had the opportunity to go to the store with Dad, I went. Even if it was only to drop a letter off at the postoffice. I was always amazed at his knowledge of everything. I would observe him and ask him questions. He was my Dad and I was proud to be his son.

Yesterday morning after breakfast Isaac and I gathered some scrap boards, pieces of an old broken table and a tarp. He brought out the drill and the tool bag and I grabbed the screws. He put on my hardhat, like he usually does when we work together, and we built the fort. It didn't take long at all. It didn't take much effort either. My plan was simply to make something that would not easily fall over on him. My two oldest daughters came out and helped us with the finishing touches, the roof. We secured one end of the tarp to the structure and the other end to the fence. The fort was complete. To me it was just a couple of hours putting some boards together with my son; but to Isaac it was a fun time working with Dad. I was not aware of how much this meant to him until I saw his reaction. Once we were finished building the fort, Isaac was beaming with joy and excitement. He kept expressing his gratitude over and over again. I could see the happiness in his face and the bounce in his step. To me it wasn't that big of a deal and, actually, I wish I could have built him something bigger and better; but he thought what we built was just fine. He loved it. He began making plans of how to use it and what he was going to put in it.

I've come to realize that our children don't demand perfection or extravagance from us. All they desire, all they need is some time with us. Even if it's just a walk around the block or running an errand together; even an hour or two building a temporary fort in the back yard can make a huge and impact on them. Isaac got the best of both with this fort, he got the fort and he got to spend some time with Dad. I'm sure today he will be outside in his fort playing with his little brother, both of them letting their imaginations run wild.

I thank God for bringing those memories of my time with my father to mind. It has helped me put things in perspective. The next time I will purpose to make the most of my time with my children.


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Life Is Too Short

Lunch with Ernesto at El Jimador in Thornton, Colorado | March 17, 2010

In January 2009 I parted ways with a good friend. We had some differences and decided it was a good idea to put some time between us before we tried to work things out. Shortly after we went our separate ways he was diagnosed with cancer in his throat. As he struggled through his chemotherapy sessions I encouraged him via the Internet. I wasn't sure if showing up in person would bless him or not so I kept my distance. After the chemotherapy, the cancer went into remission and he slowly began to gain his health back. It had been about a year since we had last met or talked in person when he called me up. He invited my wife and me over so we could sit with him and his wife and work things out between us. We accepted the invitation and that evening we cleared the air and were restored. He told me that life was too short for us to have issues between us. His bout with cancer had helped to put things in perspective. It helped him to understand what was really important in life—family and friends. From that point on we began to have lunch on a monthly basis; sometimes twice a month. It was good to have my ol’ friend back. Years ago, he was the one who took me under his wing when I was lost. He worked with me, prayed with me, prayed for me, and helped me to understand what a relationship with Yeshua was supposed to be like.

In December 2010 he and his wife joined our fledgling community. It was God’s timing. We were in the process of establishing elders in our community and, to make a long story short, Ernie was affirmed as an elder along with me. What an exciting time to be servicing God once again with my ol’ friend and mentor. Today, the community laid hands on us, prayed over us, and installed us as elders at The Front Range Messianic Community. We've got a lot of work ahead of us, but that's what we are called to do; that's what charges us.

Life is too short to hold grudges against friends, especially when there’s still a lot of work to be done for the Kingdom.


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FAQ: Are You Sephardic?

A Marranito is a Mexican gingerbread-like pastry shaped like a pig.

Shortly after we embraced the Torah in 2000, after Shabbat Service one Saturday afternoon, a woman came up to my wife and I and told us that we were "Marranos." At first I was taken aback by her comment; I couldn't believe what I had just heard. Keep in mind, I'm not the most fluent, Spanish-speaking Texican but I know what a Marrano is--it's a pig! But the expression on her face was so happy and excited-like; I could tell that she wasn't trying to insult us but actually compliment us. I thought that maybe she had no idea what she was saying so I quickly repeated the word in my head, maybe I could tell if she was trying to say something else in Spanish. Nope, "Mar-ahhh-nose" sounds like "Mar-ahhh-nose." I had heard correctly, she was calling us pigs. Before I could wipe the confused look on my face she began to explain what she meant.

During the Spanish Inquisition (1478-1834) the Jews who lived in Spain, the Sephardic Jews, were either expelled, tortured, killed or forced to convert to Catholicism. Some believe that in order to prove that they had truly converted to Catholicism, they were forced to eat a piece of pork in public--hence the name 'Marrano.' This name has since been used to describe the 'Secret Jews' or 'Crypto Jews' who were forced to convert to Catholicism but kept their Jewish identity in secret. In Hebrew they are called Anusim which means 'Coerced Ones.'

Many of these Sephardic Anusim fled to Arabic counties in the Middle East, to North Africa, and to the Americas. Some historians believe that many of the people who came across the Atlantic with Christopher Columbus in 1492, were actually Sephardic Jews fleeing from Spanish-Catholic persecution. Eventually, the Catholic Church would follow them to the New World.

During the Mexican Inquisition (1571-1820) the Jewish people were also tortured, killed or forced to convert to Catholicism. The 'Marranos' would continue to practice Judaism in secret and as generations passed, their secret Jewish traditions where handed down without an explanation. These traditions became unusual but unquestioned practices. For instance, women would light two candles on Friday evenings but they wouldn't know why; it was just something that their mothers had taught them.

Within the past few decades, more and more Sephardic Anusim have surfaced in the Southwestern United States; namely New Mexico, Texas, Colorado, Arizona and California. Their eyes have been opened and their hearts are turning back to the culture of their forefathers. Their secret traditions are being traced back to Judaism and their true heritage as part of the Chosen People of Adonai has been revealed. Many believe that the Latinos who are now embracing the Torah and Hebraic traditions are actually long-lost Anusim, 'Marranos' being called back home.

When this woman called us 'Marranos' after Shabbat Service that afternoon, this is what she meant. She assumed that we were answering the call of our hearts to return to Judaism. It sounded convincing or at least I was convinced. But before we could say, "Yes we are Marranos" we first had to ask ourselves, do we have any of these tell-tale traditions or practices in our families? Or do we have any actual Sephardic Jewish ancestors in our family trees? After reflecting on our childhood and the religious practices of our grandparents and after thoroughly interrogating our parents, we could not identify the traditions nor could we find any Jewish ancestors. So no, I am not Sephardic, but I am a fellow heir (Ephesians 3:6).


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